As an antidote to the anger and anxiety of recent weeks, I am listing some kind and helpful things Ron has done just lately.
1. He scheduled an extra session when I was in a crisis from group. When I got there, he said, “I want to hear from all the parts of you, all of them.” I found this so touching. It’s easy to leave parts aside, because they bring chaos and emotions from the past, but here he was, wanting to hear from them. Half the time, I don’t want to hear from them, so it was a relief that he did.
2. He schedules ten minute ‘check in’ phone calls the evening of a session if I’ve ended up reliving a traumatic experience and am very upset.
3. He once came into the office on a Saturday to see me. I was his only client that day.
4. He never argues with parts. He takes everything they say as the complete truth as they know it.
5. He believed me when I said that walking out on the group wasn’t meant as a hostile gesture – I was just completely overwhelmed. He nodded and didn’t dispute this, which you could easily do. I appreciated that.
6. He said my feeling the next day after group of feeling like people I met would throw stones was powerful. He didn’t discount it. This was a session where we weren’t getting along.
7. He has replied to my emails, about two a week on average, for over two years. Just reassurance. It’s like a safety valve for me – I figure I can always write to Ron about whatever awfulness is happening to me and feel a bit better.
8. I am less depressed than I was before I met him. I used to push everything away, including parts, and it made me very depressed. It’s still a struggle often, but now I know what the struggle is.
9. The way I relate to people has changed. I am now able to consider how I really do feel about what another person is saying to me. Even if I don’t say it, I now am able to notice it and accept it. Everything used to be a push just to get by, to blend in, and I would rarely know how I felt or say how I felt. That’s changed. I now have a choice.
10. I’ve felt truly cared about when Ron responded to hurt parts of me. It’s such a relief and so calming and healing to be accepted in this way.