Quick update post. I’ve been apartment hunting. I can well afford to live on my own paying full rent, even in an expensive big city. So I’m taking the plunge, trusting that I will continue to have work. I’m spurred on by a ‘meltdown’ by my ex-husband last week….I won’t go into the details, but the upshot was that he felt he could throw me out of my apartment at any time, raise the rent, etc etc, which he screamed and screamed and screamed…
I don’t need that kind of thing anymore. And in any case, it’s too awkward, living in the same house as an ex, even if it’s separate apartments. And he needs to come into my place a lot, as he needs access to the basement…it’s not working out.
Very stressful for me. I just lost a job, found a job, am getting used to the new job. But it must be done. My friend is helping me look. Very nice of him. And it emerges that he enjoys driving around and seeing apartments – he finds it entertaining. There you go.
I’m trying to figure out what I can afford, and seeing what is out there in different price ranges. I’ve seen three that I could live in, so far. One was really quite beautiful, though it didn’t have a balcony, which is something I really want. And more expensive than I was thinking. One was in a cool area, but a house full of younger people, and I’m worried it won’t be quiet. But very clean and on the top floor. One really interesting, top floor of a house, old, but smelled a bit like mice I thought.
At work, I again have issues. Of course. Really, I wish I could get a grip on what goes on at work. I guess I’m too wound up.
I’m finding the young Indian co-worker very irritating, as he doesn’t know the job, yet argues with me about every detail. A few days ago, I couldn’t stop myself from snapping at him. Then I apologized. Now I ignore him or kind of play the underdog, and he is very happy to take the role of top dog. Sigh.
How could they hire him? His spoken English is even not very good. This is the writer that will correct their grammar? Sigh.
At the same time, I need to keep a grip and not let irritation show. The manager likes this guy, finds him charming and young. It’s not clear that she will be able to tell good work from bad actually. Sometimes if an editor has very few changes, they like that better, it’s less irritating for them. And he will have few changes.
He has his good points…but I wish he knew the job.
Tomorrow is a big presentation of how we want to approach a ‘redesign’ of their documentation…Not my favorite thing to do. When I said that to him, that I am not good at presentations, he became condescending at once. Sigh.
I need to keep an even keel…not let my feelings show…as the most important skill in a bank is looking good for other people. Dress well, make your points with confidence, and they’ll believe you are good. Never make enemies or let your real feelings show. Never express irritation or disagreement.
It’s actually not a bad situation, just my usual difficulties getting along and playing the game. I actually think it’s worth playing, I just have a hard time doing so.